The day before NS!

Dear friends,

(This is a combined post between me and ahyong, we are alternating the paragraphs so go figure out who's who haha)

I remember 4 years back, in a inconspicuous classroom inside ri’s block A there stood a short inconspicuous guy, my lit teacher. It was one of his usual boring lessons, but something that day he was talking about caught my ears. Colin Cheong was going through a poem about some guy enlisting the next day, and that guy was describing his feelings in the poem. So I remember very clearly Colin Cheong asked us how we would feel the day before enlistment. And I wasn’t very sure then how exactly I would feel.

Okie its my turn, but my memory has been degrading since 11 am on the 24th of Nov, exactly 1 hour short of two weeks to my enlistment time – 10 am on the 8th of Dec – and I simply can’t remember that particular lit lesson (On the other hand, it could be because I simple didn’t take lit with colin cheong). I had promised to myself before the start of ‘A’s, that I will make sure I spend these 13 days and 23 hours fully and not waste them away like I always do. After all, these are my last days in civilization and even my procrastinating nature has kicked in – the last 13 days out of 18 years and almost 3 months of my life so far. I wanted to make sure that the last feeling I’ll bring into Tekong chalet is regret, and I can enter NS refreshed, renewed and ready to face anything that the harshest PTIs and PCs can throw at me.

I don’t really know what to write next. There are many many worries that are flowing through my head, some I cant even express in words (okay lah my English lousy I know). First and foremost there is the worry of what to expect and what not, then there is the worry of loneliness and homesickness, then somewhere in my head there is the worry of the stupid Harvard rejection that I am going to have to face up to ALONE and many many many others. For me, NS has just come up probably at the wrongest moment, when I have so many things unsettled and undone. Im not at all ready to face it all.

Now, hours before I step into NS, I’m glad to say that while I did not eventually manage to do everything I wanted to before enlisting, at least I completed a whole long list of stuff that ranges from eating a whole KFC buddy meal alone to playing casino royale style poker. I have really enjoyed myself these last two weeks before NS and I really want to thank all of you guys for making this possible. I would probably say that these last two weeks have been my happiest weeks for a very very long time. Of course, being me, I didn’t manage to finish my uni applications and various other small stuff here and there (actually I wont consider 8 undone essays small stuff). But I’ll say that I’m not bringing any regrets into NS and I’m really kinda looking forward to it, as a change in lifestyle, a chance to finally shed the extra weight I have put on over the years, and an opportunity for personal growth. I am ready to face it, although I would really like another week in civilisation for me to settle the loose ends I’ve left behind…

Its 1am now, I have just transferred all my contacts into the old china phone, and mmsed all my precious pictures I have taken (you know) over as well. In another 11 hours, I will be on way to BMTC school 1, and accepting my new destiny. I have no idea where fate will lead me or what it will do to me. All I know is that time is fleeting and only memories are permanent. And I know, these memories will be the only things will keep me sane in that godforsaken place. I will cherish them very well, I promise.

Yeah, memories of the fun times, they’ll definitely keep me going for a long time, and of course, my mp3 player (I hope they allow it, I’m bringing anyway). Don’t forget that while I’m physically out of civilisation, communication technology has enabled network coverage over tekong, so PLEASE DO SMS AND CALL ME NOW AND THEN, though I prolly wont be able to reply that much hahaha.

With a gagging stone in my throat, I bid you farewell. I wished it could have ended differently but… I just wanted you to be happy. Take care and I love you. Yes, you. I do, k.

Okie I’m not gonna say all that mushy stuff haha, but do enjoy urselves and ur last week/month/3 mths in civilisation and make sure that you enter NS with no regrets I suppose. I think the most important thing is to go in with an open mind, and I’ll definitely strive to achieve that, hopefully I’ll survive to come out and tell the story. Please pardon me for the incoherent ramblings and the corrupted sentence structures, I’m kinda writing this with 2 hours to go to NS after 4 hours of sleep and am very very very blur now… Aiyah, the rest, wait until Christmas then tell u guys lah…

Oh by the way, how would you feel, the day before your enlistment?

With much love,
Spaced and ahyong.


P.S. Additional good luck goes to Kenny for his newfound interest :P